Note: This is an opinion blog post, and to be taken as such.

In the spirit of Orange Week let’s talk about one of the most talked about phenomenon of last year: the #metoo movement. The movement has been praised just as much as it has been criticized. It started with headlines like “Women unite in #MeToo” and ended in “Has the #metoo movement gone too far?”. So today, we will take #MeToo back to its roots. Away from Kavanaugh, Weinstein or House of Cards and back to the women of color who started it – and their message. In the light of its origins, these Hollywood scandals take a different shape. It is not about “kicking white men off their jobs” it is not even about them at all. It is about the survivors.

The #metoo movement was started by a civil rights activist Tarana Burke in 2006. Burke was working in a non-profit called “Just Be” that focused on the overall well-being of young women of color. Working there, she heard countless stories of sexual abuse that left her speechless. She learned to connect with the young victims by saying “You’re not alone. This happened to me too.” Burke saw the power of that little phrase and she kept using it for her life-long career of activism to help victims of sexual assault. In an interview with CNN she explained it like this: "On one side, it's a bold declarative statement that 'I'm not ashamed' and 'I'm not alone.' On the other side, it's a statement from survivor to survivor that says 'I see you, I hear you, I understand you and I'm here for you or I get it.'" This is the message, the only message that #metoo is about.

The founder of the movement has said in many interviews that she sometimes regrets the derailing of the movement that has become a Hollywood spectacle. She blames the media and our culture that always wants to fixate on drama. In 2018, she wants to move the attention away from the obsession with the perpetrators and back to what she originally envisioned: healing.

To me, it is important that we understand that boys too have their place in this healing process. Male victims should be taken seriously and be included in this movement. But we should also focus on all of the other men. The ones that feel threatened by the movement, the ones that say that they are scared to flirt with women or to even be alone with them.

I think that some of these insecurities come from the fact that many of us have had awkward sexual encounters in the past, and now men feel as if they were on trial for every single drunk kiss they ever had. First of all, you are not. But if you feel like you might have hurt somebody in the past, it is okay to reach out to them.

There are a lot of things that can cause sexual trauma, that do not necessarily fit the criminal justice definition of rape. Many of us have had such encounters but we do not dare to talk about them. I think one of the reasons is that the first words that come to mind are “rapist” and “victim” and neither of us want to be either of that.

The #metoo movement should encourage all of us to look back at our sexual history and talk to the people we might have made uncomfortable. There is no shame in learning to know better. We all grew up with the same incomplete sexual education. We all should have known more about consent before the #metoo movement and we all have a lot more to learn. Reach out to whoever you have in mind right now and talk it through. The #metoo movement is about connecting and about healing, you too have your place in this process.

Another reason why men feel uncomfortable in the times of #metoo is because they are scared of false accusations. Fake accusations are a serious crime and we should address them when they occur. But it is important to know that they are extremely rare, while male rape victims are not.

If you as a man only see the #metoo as a threat, then the movement has failed you. You are supposed to feel empowered and protected, just as much as the girls do. A 2010 study* said that about 2-10% of rape allegations are unfounded (the FBI thinks the real number lies around 8%**) while RAINN*** claims that 1 in 6 boys will experience sexual assault at some point of their lives. Let's tackle the real problem.

I want to encourage men to ask questions. To talk about #metoo without being scared of saying something "wrong" that could launch an avalanche of hate. The taboos around consent have brought us into this mess and now is the time for talking. #Metoo is about you, too.

*https://web.archive.org/web/20180101025446/https://icdv.idaho.gov/conference/handouts/False-Allegations.pdf

**https://ucr.fbi.gov/crime-in-the-u.s/1996/96sec2.pdf

***https://1in6.org/get-information/the-1-in-6-statistic/

During 4thyear of my social work studies in Glasgow, Scotland, I attended a domestic violence course. I found the course to be captivating, thought provoking and very engaging. At some point throughout the course we were asked to go up to the white board and write down key words describing how a victim of domestic violence feels during the abusive relationship. I wrote down the words ‘on edge’ and was subsequently asked to explain what I meant by those words. I clarified that I imagine a victim of domestic violence to be constantly wondering about when the abuser will lash out again, which must place them in a perpetual state of anxiety. This in return, must be excruciatingly exhausting for the victim. Following my answer, one of the course leaders proceeded to demonstrate this feeling of being ‘on edge’ all the time. However, this performance was carried out with no explanation. She blew up a balloon and walked around the room squeezing and rubbing it while continuing the course. The act itself was so simple and yet so significant. I cannot speak on behalf of the other students but for me the effect was immediate. My focus shifted to the balloon. I was distracted to the point I couldn’t listen to the course leaders. The fact that the balloon could burst at any given time was, truthfully, angst provoking for me. At that moment, I was able to understand, to a certain degree that is, what kind of stress and anxiety a person suffering domestic violence experiences.

Within the European Union, the Grand Duchy of Luxembourg presents a unique stance against gender inequality. In fact, Luxembourg has a Ministry, which is specifically devoted to promoting gender equality in every domain of private and public life – the Ministry of Equal Opportunities (Ministère de l’Égalité des Chances).

Since 2006, Luxembourg has been actively reinforcing legislation in regards to domestic violence. For instance, the Domestic Violence Act 2003 has been amended and republished in 2013 (Loi du 30 juillet 2013 portant modification de la loi du 8 Septembre 2003 sur la violence domestique) and provides significant safety, care and support for victims of domestic violence. Safety is provided by an eviction order (with permission from the State Prosecutor) against the perpetrator for up to 14 days form the family home. The perpetrator is not allowed to approach or contact the victim in any form (oral, written or through a third person). Therefore, the police regularly monitor the victims and the perpetrators as a way of checking the bans are being respected and as a preventative measure. Care and support are provided by the highly specialised domestic violence victim support service (Service d’Assistance aux Victimes de Violence Domestique), which is responsible for aiding, guiding and advising victims, including the children who often witness the violence and become victims themselves.

Moreover, notable importance is also placed on supporting perpetrators. Hence, perpetrators are required to register with the Responsible Service For Perpetrators of Domestic Violence. The Luxembourgish Red Cross service ‘RIICHT ERAUS’, for example, is centred on counselling, advice and conflict/anger management.

To this day, domestic violence remains the most prevalent human rights violation in the world and yet, it is the least disclosed and talked about. It is a deep violation that affects women and girls in every country and does not discriminate against race, class, culture, ethnicity and age (McQuigg, 2011). Global estimates published by the World Health Organisation (2017) indicate that roughly 1 in 3 (35%) of women worldwide have experienced domestic violence in their lifetime.

According to the Oxford Dictionary, domestic violence is defined as ‘violent or aggressive behaviour within the home, typically involving the violent abuse of a spouse or partner’ (Oxford Dictionaries, n.d.).However, this definition is not enough to truly understand the nuances and complexity of domestic violence (Pitman, 2017).Violent behaviour can take on various forms and manifest as physical, psychological and emotional, sexual, verbal and economic abuse.

Pitman (2017, p.144) states that, within the field of domestic violence research, the ‘long-term negative impacts of domestic violence on women’s economic, physical and mental health and the consequences for children and their life chances are indisputable’. However, awareness of recoveries after separation from the perpetrator has been receiving more attention and gradually developing (Katz, 2015). Some researchers are beginning to change their views on the mothers’ weaknesses and failures (i.e. not leaving the abuser sooner) (Holt, 2017) as well as their understanding of children as passive and docile victims. Domestic violence does not affect every child in the same exact way (Hungerford et. al. 2012). Therefore, the focus is shifting on identifying and acknowledging children’s strengths and even desires to support their abused mothers in finding solutions to their situation (Katz, 2015). As a matter of fact, if children are exposed to effective parenting from their mother and possess good pro-social and emotion regulation skills, their resilience can be increased considerably (Hungerford et al. 2012)

In Luxembourg we have a great array of services that are specialised in supporting and empowering victims of domestic violence and their children. Here are the following:

In light of this, the Ministry of Equal Opportunities and the Luxembourg Zonta Club organise an annual event named ‘Orange Week’ in order to raise awareness around issues of domestic violence in Luxembourg. This event was first launched in 2008 from the United Nation’s General Secretary with the aim to raise awareness and work towards putting en end to gender-based violence. Luxembourg’s first ‘Orange Week’ took place from the 19thto the 26thof November 2017 andconsisted of a series of small events and manifestations (public and non-public buildings lit up in the colour orange, as a sign of solidarity). The end of the ‘Orange Week’ was marked by the ‘Orange March’.

Sources:

http://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/violence-against-women

https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/domestic_violence

http://luxembourg.public.lu/en/vivre/egalite-chances/index.html

http://legilux.public.lu/eli/etat/leg/memorial/2003/148

http://legilux.public.lu/eli/etat/leg/loi/2013/07/30/n1/jo

https://gouvernement.lu/dam-assets/fr/actualites/communiques/2017/01-janvier/03-mutsch-violence-domestique/Brochure-_EN_-_pdf_.pdf

http://justice.public.lu/fr/famille/violences-domestiques/index.html

http://www.croix-rouge.lu/en/riichteraus/

http://mega.public.lu/fr/societe/orange-week/index.html

https://fed.lu/wp/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/Rapport-annuel-2017-FED.pdf

Holt, S. (2017). Domestic Violence and the Paradox of

Post-Separation Mothering. British Journal of Social Work, 47, pp. 2049-2067

Hungerford, A., Wait, S. K., Fritz, A. M. and Clements, C. M. (2012). Exposure to intimate partner violence and children’s psychological adjustment, cognitive functioning, and social competence: A review. Aggression and Violent Behaviour, 17(4), pp. 373–82

Katz, E. (2015). Recovery-Promoters: Ways in whichChildren and Mothers Support One Another’s Recoveries from DomesticViolence. British Journal of Social Work, 45, pp.153-169

McQuigg, R. (2011). International Human Rights Law and Domestic Violence: The Effectiveness of International Human Rights Law(1st ed.). Routeledge

Pitman, T. (2017). Living with Coercive Control: Trapped within a Complex Web of Double Standards, Double Binds and Boundary Violations. British Journal of Social Work, 47, pp.143-161

The Luxembourg Times recently published an opinion piece by Bill Wirtz, titled “The Women's Council narrative on female representation is antiquated”.

https://luxtimes.lu/luxembourg/35374-the-women-s-council-narrative-on-female-representation-is-antiquated

As the title foreshadows, the writer is attacking the CNFL’s recent actions to ask for an equal government. He says:

“On the one hand, making the claim that "women need to be represented" we imply that women can only be represented by another woman, regardless of her ideas and political affiliation. By the same token, you'd have to believe that the men in parliament are also the representatives of the men in this country. That of course is ridiculous: despite half the country being women, they made different choices than the CNFL would have preferred, and that is their prerogative. Isn't assuming that you know what's best for a woman, as opposed to herself knowing that, the essence of sexism?”

I do not see the problem with saying that women can only truly be represented by women. If we have 12 women and 48 men making decisions over women’s healthcare, access to abortion, prostitution, equal pay, the taxation of female hygiene products, sexual assault in the workplace, birth control etc. they will never represent women in a fair way. And this goes way further than “women-only” issues. If we let men decide over our justice system, our taxes, our workplace and every other part of our daily lives it seems obvious that our laws will always be best suited for them, and them only.

Wirtz then goes on to say: “If women choose to prefer social professions (those that involve working directly with people) over a high-level investment fund manager post or top-level political spokesperson, and no barriers to entry were put up to stop them, then who is the Women's Council to judge their decision?”

While it is very sweet that you want to save women from making money, taking part in important decisions and being independent, your argument makes no sense. If you had actually taken the time to read the CNFL press release, you would have seen that a record of 249 women were candidates (and 298 men). The women candidates did not decide they should stay in social professions, in this case, the electorate did that for them. This shows the power of the unconscious bias. The problem is that we often tend to associate roles of power and responsibility with men, because it is what we are used to. It’s what we see on TV, in the history books and in the countries all around us. We have to break barriers and put women in these positions to show every little girl that she can do it all. And to show every voter in the world that women are just as capable to manage these responsibilities as men are.

And saying that there are no barriers for women to enter politics is just ignorant. Growing up a woman is like growing up in a labyrinth of barriers. You have to work a lot harder to get the same recognition or pay as your male colleagues do, you have to consistently fight back sexist bias or comments and if you reach a top-level position, you are a lot more likely to lose it again. Numerous studies have consistently found that women are perceived differently in dominant positions than men, even if they behave exactly the same. These biases are the strongest barriers because they cannot simply be put away with a law; we have to change the mindset of a whole generation.

Wirtz finishes his piece by saying: “We cannot fundamentally undermine the system through which we elect representatives, just so that the Women's Council can declare a major success. And if the Council insists that it is completely apolitical in its support for quotas, we could suggest a composition of the Chamber of Deputies, filled by 50% Marine Le Pen-style women, and would likely discover that those are probably not the women they were thinking of.”

I love how people always go get the Marine Le Pen example when we talk about women in politics because it is just the dumbest thing in the world. Imagine having a government of only women making decisions about what you can and cannot do with your penis and then we would tell you “You can be represented, but it has to be Hitler.”

She’s beautiful when she’s angry is a history-documentary, directed by Mary Dore, which deals with the feminism movement in the United States of America from the late 1960s through the mid 1970s.

Birth control, abortion, sexual harassment, African American women, lesbians’ outtings and equal pay are just some major themes brought up in the movie.

It lets you recognize the battles that have been won by strong and fearless women and which inequalities still have to be fought.

She’s beautiful when she’s angry is a well-deserved appreciation of women and the remarkable way in which they changed the world to the better!

These days, many people still don’t understand that feminism isn’t about letting men and women compete or that the goal is not to let women be any better than men, but to let them cooperate and to have equal rights and possibilities.

Therefore this documentary is a great way to understand why feminism is essential and where it comes from.

So to everyone whose curious and wants to get to know the history and ideal of feminism a little bit better, switch to netflix and enjoy!

FEMINISM. Feminism is the idea that men and women deserve the same chances, opportunities and treatment. Feminism is the movement that fights against gender stereotypes, sexism and inequality. However feminism has nothing to do with bashing men or taking away chances and resources from boys to give them to girls. It is quite the opposite actually. Boys and men need feminism just like girls and women do. We need to free every gender from the chains that stereotypes and gender norm have laid upon us so we can thrive as a society and as individuals. Here are just a few examples of why we need feminism for boys.

Suicides.

The World Health Organisation recently published a statistic that said that 2/3 of suicides are male. Close to 800'000 people die of suicide every year which is one person every 40 seconds and a total of 1'462 boys and men per day.

Our world, our health-system, our society has failed those boys. We need to step up our game.

We need to stop telling boys that crying is for girls. How the fuck did we end up in a society where the natural reaction of your body from stubbing your toe on furniture is seen as girly? Do boys not stub their toes on the kitchen table????

And how did we end up putting genders on emotions? How is it that crying, jealousy or mood swings are seen as girly while anger, violence and self-confidence is associated with men? Don't we all feel those things? Weren't we all mad at the end of "How I met your mother" or crying at the end of "Marley and me"? Aren't we all a little jealous when our partner orders a better entree in the restaurant and aren't we all a little violent at the breakfast buffet?

Let boys cry when they fall on their knees and men when they get their heart broken. Crying is natural, freeing and healing.

We also need to encourage women to join the labour force and we need to fight for equal pay. The incredible responsibility of providing for a family can be tough on men. Even though more and more married women take on careers, they are often paid less, which leaves the men as the primary earner in heterosexual households. This is a feminist problem all in itself but it is also important for men. If women earned as much as men did, couples could more easily share household and work responsibilities. Men could take more time off to be with their families, which is scientifically proven good for mental health. It would also reduce their work-related stress because if something were to happen to their jobs, their partners could have their back.

Sexual Assault

1 out of every 10 rape victims are male. 34% of those males are under the age of 12. In America, an estimated 86'000 inmates are sexually assaulted in prison or jail and 60% of those attacks are done by prison staff. In the military, 43% of female rape victims reported and only 10% of the male victims.

It is hard enough to come out as a female victim because of the rape culture society that we live in. Testimonies are not believed, rape kits are not tested and rapists are not incarcerated. But imagine going through all of this with the fucked up narrative that "Boys want sex all the time". The stereotypes around boys sexuality makes it incredibly hard for men to be taken seriously when they are sexually assaulted. FUCK THAT. No means no, no matter who says it.

Body Image Issues:

In today's Instagram-obsessed world every gender struggles with body image. It is not something that is exclusively a boys' problem but it is addressed way less for boys. How many Cosmo-covers have you seen with men from different sizes, shapes and skin tones who laugh at the camera with a "Love yourself" banner all across the page? Boys struggle too. They are pressured to be tall, fit, acne-free and muscular just as much as girls are pressured to be skinny.

We need to show boys realistic body images on TV, in magazines and in real life so they can feel beautiful and sexy just the way they are.

And last but not least ... HOW THE FUCK IS IT LEGAL TO MAKE BOYS PAY TO ENTER A CLUB WHEN GIRLS GET IN FOR FREE ???????????????? like fuck that could have been 3 shots of tequila but nahh I had to pay entrance????

"Das Prestige des Lehrerberufs sinkt, deshalb interessieren sich immer weniger dafür. Ich weiß es klingt schräg, aber leider trägt die starke Feminisierung ebenfalls dazu bei, dass der Beruf abgewertet wird."

- Patrick Arendt, Präsident des Syndikats "Erzéiung a Wëssenchaft" im Land-Gespräch über Bildungsreformen und seine Sorge gegenüber einer Zersplitterung der Luxemburger Schullandschaft.

Nein Herr Arendt, es klingt nicht schräg. Es klingt sexistisch.

In der letzten Ausgabe des "Lëtzebuerger Land" spricht Patrick Arendt, der Präsident des Syndikats "Erzéiung a Wëssenschaft" über die Hürden und Probleme des Bildung Systems in Luxemburg. Eine der Facetten des Problems, die er anspricht, ist die "Feminisierung" des Berufs. Ihm nach verliert der Beruf an "Prestige" wegen der Prädominanz der Frauen in der Branche. Ehm, pardon?

Ich bin überzeugt davon, dass die meisten Bereiche am besten funktionieren, wenn Männer und Frauen zusammenarbeiten, deshalb wünsche ich mir mehr Frauen in der Politik und mehr Männer in den Schulen. In den Schulen ist dies von besonderer Bedeutung, weil die Lehrer die Kinder in ihrer Entwicklung begleiten und es für Kinder wichtig ist Vorbilder in ihrem Leben zu haben, mit denen sie sich identifizieren. Deshalb ja, GO BOYS für die Karriere als Lehrer.

Aber zu sagen, dass die harte Arbeit der Lehrerinnen den Beruf des Lehrers "abwertet", ist eine Frechheit und von Grund auf falsch. Meiner Erfahrung nach war die harte und liebevolle Arbeit der Frauen in den Schulen das "prestigeuste" am ganzen Schulsystem. Wie Sie es schon selber im Artikel darstellen, gibt es in unserem Bildungssystem so manches Problem. Frauen sind keines davon.

"Le viol est un crime. Mais la drague insistante ou maladroite n’est pas un délit, ni la galanterie une agression machiste."

Non, la drague maladroite n'est pas un crime. Mais elle n'a pas sa place dans un environnement professionnel. Comment vous imaginez-vous un monde où hommes et femmes ont les mêmes opportunités, si un sexe continue d'être vu comme un objet sexuel au lieu d'un collègue de travail à prendre au sérieux?

Et savez-vous ce qui est un crime par contre?

Masturbation en présence de personnes non-consentantes. Menaces ou agressions en réaction à un refus. Mensonges ou avantages promis en échange de faveurs sexuelles. Violer, rencogner, manipuler et abuser de personnes plus faibles.

Vous dites que le mouvement #MeToo "sert en réalité les intérêts des ennemis de la liberté sexuelle, des extrémistes religieux (et) des pires réactionnaires".

D'abord, si vous connaissez une religion qui prône le combat contre l'abus sexuel - hit me up. Deuxièmement, la liberté sexuelle des hommes va très bien, ne vous inquiétez pas. Le plus grand problème de la conception de la sexualité masculine dans notre société est que nous considérons que tous les hommes veulent à tout moment avoir des relations sexuelles avec quiconque. Ceci pose un très grand problème, surtout pour les victimes masculines.

La liberté sexuelle des femmes par contre nécessite encore de plus grands changements. Et notamment une conversation ouverte sur le consentement et la sexualisation permanente du corps féminin. Vous voulez la révolution sexuelle? Vous voulez que les femmes puissent vivre leurs désirs? Alors aidez-nous à créer une société où elles peuvent le faire sans devoir craindre le viol, la honte ou une autre atteinte à leur personnalité.

Finalement, tout cela se ramène à un même et unique combat : parlons du consentement, des désirs, des préférences, des orientations, des relations, des hommes et des femmes. Mais pas comme ça. Bas les pattes du victim blaming.

Voix de jeunes femmes vient de faire son début sur le plan international en intervenant à une conférence organisée par le Conseil national des femmes françaises à Paris. Une petite délégation de Voix de jeunes femmes a représenté le groupe devant leur homologue français dans un atelier qui visait à motiver les jeunes françaises et français à suivre leur exemple et de s'engager pour l'égalité des genres. En effet, lors des échanges entre les deux groupes, il est devenu clair que les combats dans les deux pays se ressemblent fortement. Espérons voir d'autres collaborations dans le futur.

Beaten. Pushed. Raped. Aggressed. Shamed. Silenced.

Every day millions of girls and women suffer from violence as a consequence of the toxic sense of male entitlement that our society teaches and allows. It's not because of a lack of our modesty or because of some inherent power dynamic. It's because of choices that violent men take. Every slap, every touch, every push is a choice. Today is the international day to end violence against women and girls.

So today have the guts, have the moral integrity to break the silence and stand with women everywhere.

Let's choose love.

Fuck you.

Fuck you for the days I spent crying.

Fuck you for the days I spent planning my suicide.

Fuck you for the disgust I felt for myself.

Fuck you for the panic I had when a man stood less than three meters away from me.

Fuck you for the unease I had, even with my own father, only because he’s a man.

Fuck you for my anxiety.

Fuck you for my panic attacks that hit me when I least expect it.

Fuck you for the disgust I have in sex.

Fuck you for the worries I have, whenever I wear something I feel sexy in, because I think it might make a man want to rape me.

Fuck you for the terror I have of going out of the house, because I’m afraid I might meet you.

Fuck you for the inability of being naked without thinking what you’ve done to me.

Fuck you for the nights I still lay awake crying.

Fuck you for every morning I wake up, thinking that today will be better, but it isn’t.

Fuck you for every day I spend at home because I can’t build up the motivation to get dressed or even shower.

Fuck you for the frustration I feel because talking to my psychologist doesn’t make everything better.

Fuck you for the dread I await the court date with.

Fuck you for ruining my self-confidence.

Fuck you for making my parents cry.

Fuck you for doing this to me 1 month before my exams.

Fuck you for being the reason I failed my exams.

Fuck you for the anxiousness I still feel around boys. Fuck you for the inability I have to laugh at sexual jokes.

Fuck you for being my every second thought every day. Fuck you for the sense of panic I feel every time I smell your perfume anywhere.

Fuck you for the anger I feel, because my life isn’t the same anymore.

Fuck you for the endless meds I had to take, to make sure I didn’t have HIV.

Fuck you for holding me back and kissing me before you let me run.

Fuck you for shushing me when I started crying.

Fuck you for not stopping when I clearly said no.

Fuck you for scarring me for life.

#MeToo

Me too. Them too. Most of us. Most of us have experienced sexual harassment or sexual assault. While I am so glad that survivors are speaking up, at the same time my heart was breaking when I saw the amount of people participating in the ‘Me too’ movement. My heart aches knowing how much pain they have been through.

I personally became aware of sexual assault, harassment and rape when I hit puberty and ‘turned into a woman’. I suddenly noticed very different treatment and rules because I was a girl. I was being told to ‘not walk alone’, ‘better take a taxi’, to ‘cover up’ and avoid showing my body too much. I wasn’t supposed to stay out too late and most importantly I shouldn’t trust anyone with their intentions towards me.

Years later, when I was sexually assaulted indeed, even the ‘best advice’ couldn’t have helped me. I had no chance, I couldn’t escape. I wish that no person ever would have to go through this. I felt broken, empty and disgusted. How did he think he had the right?

The problem is that in many cases, rapists do have the right. Sexual assault is rarely punished, at least not severely. Millions of rapes go unreported as a result and thus rapists will never be punished. They run free and are a danger for so many other people.

I still think about it often. Sometimes it keeps me from sleeping. Sometimes I lose my appetite. Often, I have a hard time trusting people.

I did feel shame, but not anymore. I will never understand why it is more shameful to be raped than to be a rapist. While I don’t understand that thought pattern, I do understand where it comes from.

It’s institutions, it’s cultural beliefs, it’s society, it’s women’s position in society, it’s gender inequality, it’s the law system, it’s women’s sexualisation, it’s societal norms and values and so much more. The one good thing in all of this bad mess is that these are things that can be changed. It will take time, but I am hopeful. I am hopeful that through movements like ‘Me too’, we’ll manage to raise awareness and take the first step into a future, where sexual assault will always be unacceptable.

When my grandmother visited me, we went to a restaurant.

As I was tired and wanted to go, she jumped.

“You are not going home alone, are you?”

It was a Sunday evening, 10 o’clock.

I am lucky. I am one of those 3 out of 4 girls that has not been raped.

Isn’t there something wrong with that statement? I said I am lucky.

Not being raped should not be considered luck. It should simply be normal.

That doesn’t mean I am not scared.

I don’t like walking home alone when it’s dark.

I don’t feel comfortable entering a place solely populated by male strangers.

I panic when I think someone is following me.

Every girl has been taught how to behave.

Don’t wear something that might attract attention.

Don’t get drunk.

Don’t leave your drink unattended.

Don’t take any risk.

I wonder what we teach our boys.

One in four girls has been raped, statistics say.

Every girl has been sexually harassed. That is what I have to add.

I once read a sentence about consent:

“Consent is not the absence of no;

consent is an enthusiastic yes.”

Nothing happened when I walked home that night.

That doesn’t mean I stop being scared.

How can I feel save if I know friends who have been raped?

“There’s a time when the machine becomes so odious,

makes you so sick at heart,

that you can’t take part,

you can’t even passively take part,

and you’ve got to put your bodies upon the gears and upon the wheels

upon the levers,

upon all the apparatus and you’ve got to make it stop.”

Wretches and Kings, Linkin Park, 2010

TVA et tampons - Le luxe d'être une femme

Est-il normal que l'alimentation animale, la restauration, le vin et les billets de cinéma soient tous taxés à un taux inférieur à celui appliqué aux tampons et serviettes hygiéniques?

Au Luxembourg, le taux de TVA normal s'applique à tous les produits d'hygiène féminine, à savoir les tampons, les serviettes hygiéniques et les coupes menstruelles. Ce taux s'élève actuellement à 17%.

La loi fiscale luxembourgeoise applique un taux super réduit de 3% aux produits alimentaires destinés à la consommation humaine, aux médicaments à usage humain et beaucoup d'autres biens et services nécessaires dans notre vie quotidienne, mais omet de l'appliquer aux produits d'hygiène féminine.

En effet, ceux-ci sont taxés au même taux que les cigarettes, l'essence, les bijoux et de nombreux autres produits n'étant pas considérés comme des produits de première nécessité. En d'autres mots, les tampons et serviettes hygiéniques sont considérés comme étant des produits de luxe, d'un point de vue fiscal.

Or, les produits d'hygiène féminine sont absolument indispensables pour les femmes, pendant environ 40 années de leur vie. En effet, dès la puberté, les femmes sont dépendantes des produits d'hygiène périodique pour mener une vie active pendant les jours de la menstruation. Ces produits ne sont donc nullement optionnels.

Les règles fiscales aboutissent à la création d'un état d'injustice à l'égard des femmes. Le fait d'appliquer le taux de TVA normal à ces produits qui leur sont absolument indispensables revient à obliger ces dernières à payer pour un fait naturel sur lequel elles n'ont strictement aucune influence. Cela revient à considérer que c'est un luxe d'être une femme.

Cette injustice a été reconnue et rectifiée dans plusieurs pays, dont notamment la France, qui a baissé le taux applicable à ces produits en 2015. Désormais, le droit fiscal français applique le taux intermédiaire et non plus le taux normal aux produits d'hygiène féminine, reconnaissant ainsi le caractère indispensable de ces produits pour les femmes.

En Belgique, le Conseil des ministres a approuvé un projet d'arrêté royal qui vise à baisser le taux s'appliquant aux produits d'hygiène féminine de 21% à 6%.

La baisse des impôts indirects sur ces produits est d'une importance primordiale d'un point de vue pécuniaire, mais également pour des raisons symboliques. Pouvoir mener une vie active et prendre soin de son corps et de son hygiène ne devrait pas être considéré comme un luxe.

Il est maintenant à nous de reconnaître cette injustice et de faire en sorte que la loi fiscale luxembourgeoise ne fasse pas payer aux femmes le prix de leurs règles.

J'espère que nous serons nombreux-ses à réunir nos forces contre cette injustice!

This is a story about rape.

This is a story about the 1 in 4 women and the 1 in 6 men who get sexually assaulted in their life. This is the story about untested rape kits and testimonies that no one believes. This is the story about the women that are imprisoned for being raped and the 97% of rapists that are never incarcerated.

This is a story about rape.

But more importantly, this is a story about survivors.

Thousands of survivors have come out this week with the #MeToo.

Every #MeToo is a story of injustice. Every #MeToo is strength. Every #MeToo is a reason to change the rape culture society we live in.

But what is rape culture?

Rape culture is everything from rape jokes to Donald Trump being the president of the United States. It's victim blaming, slut shaming, revenge-porn and questions like "What was she wearing?". It's teaching our girls to not get raped instead of teaching our boys not to rape.

It's omnipresent and it's much more powerful than you might dare to think.

Rape culture is what makes my heart race and my fingers tremble of fear to post this, 4 years later.

So here we go, #MeToo.

Who is today’s girl?

She’s tomorrow’s leader.

She’s president of her senior class and future president of the USA.

She’s the up-and-coming CEO of a Fortune 500 company and the brains behind the next breakthrough in medical science.

She’s a future gold medal Olympic athlete, an inventor, an entrepreneur, a philosopher. She is impacting her community – today and into the future.

Girls can do anything!

Happy International Girls day !

27 septembre 2017

A " No issue"

Jeudi dernier, une jeune femme, ayant récemment réussi les examens du CCDL, n’a pas été assermentée en tant qu'avocate. Pourquoi? Parce qu’elle portait un voile. Un voile. Il n’existe ni loi, ni règlement, ni article dans le Règlement de l’Ordre des avocats du Barreau de Luxembourg, ni jurisprudence luxembourgeoise qui interdiraient à un avocat le port du voile ou d’un autre signe religieux. Il n’y a qu’une tradition qui veut que les avocats se présentent tête et mains nues devant les juridictions. Or, une tradition n’est pas un texte non-modifiable. Les traditions n’existent- elles pas justement pour être adaptées aux changements de notre société et du monde ? Tel que permettre à des femmes musulmanes de porter le voile ou à un homme juif de porter sa kippa, comme il est le cas en Allemagne, en Angleterre ou aux Etats-Unis.

En soit, quel est le but de cette tradition ? La neutralité de l’avocat et l’égalité de tous devant la loi et devant le juge qui ne doivent pas être enfreintes par le port de signes distinctifs. Cela est en effet le principe en France et il y a certes des arguments en faveur de cette perception de la chose. Mais quel est alors l’effet de cette tradition ? La discrimination et l’exclusion de femmes aspirant à devenir des avocates brillantes en raison de leur voile. C’est stigmatiser encore plus une partie de la population mondiale qui est déjà oppressée par tous les moyens possibles.

Ceci n’est pas une déclaration en faveur du port du voile, car cela relève d’une autre discussion. Mais si une femme décide par elle-même de porter le voile, indépendamment du fait que l’on soit d’accord avec cela ou non, ne devons-nous pas la soutenir dans tout ce qu’elle aspire à faire, tout comme nous devrions le faire pour chaque femme et chaque homme indistinctement ? En Allemagne, une femme voilée peut devenir avocate sans souci. Les Allemands appellent cela la Gleichbehandlung : l’égalité de traitement. Ce principe découle de la loi sur l’égalité de traitement (Gleichbehandlunsgesetz). Pourquoi le Luxembourg ne pourrait-il pas prendre cette même voie ? Rien ne nous force à toujours suivre l’exemple de la France qui est particulièrement fixée sur cette idée de supprimer tout signe religieux et où une loi interdit le port de signes distinctifs aux avocats depuis 2015. De plus, contrairement au Luxembourg, la France est un pays laïc. Toutes les étudiantes musulmanes voilées que vous pouvez voir à la Sorbonne savent déjà que la seule voie qui leur est ouverte est de devenir juriste. D’ailleurs, vous n’en voyez presque pas, car beaucoup se décident contre les études de droit en raison de cette interdiction de porter le voile. Cela n’est-il pas triste ? Révoltant ? La femme non musulmane est, à cause de cette règle, de base avantagée par rapport à la femme musulmane qui se décide pour le voile. Voici un exemple d’inégalité criante. Surtout qu’au Luxembourg et dans chaque autre pays de l’Europe et de l’Ouest, les musulmans ne viennent souvent pas des milieux les plus avantagés. Ne devrions- nous pas justement leur donner toutes les chances possibles ? Ne devrions-nous pas être reconnaissants que nous avons des gens de différents milieux et cultures qui veulent devenir avocats chez nous et pas que des hommes et femmes blancs?

Cette tradition stigmatise et a pour effet d’exclure tout un groupe de femmes intelligentes et engagées. On ne leur donne même pas la chance de se prouver. On leur barre tout simplement le chemin. Il s’agit de nouveau d’un exemple d’intersectionnalité de sexe et de religion qui a pour conséquence la discrimination de tout un groupe de femmes. En soit, il est choquant que cette question ne se pose au Luxembourg qu’en 2017. Ceci montre déjà jusqu’où va le multiculturalisme si fièrement affiché par notre pays. Il est révoltant qu’une telle discrimination ouverte de toute une culture existe encore dans notre pays, au Luxembourg, cofondateur de l’Union européenne et coauteur de la CEDH. Car qui est touché par cette règle ? En tout cas pas les Luxembourgeois de souche. C’est une tradition que l’on pouvait comprendre il y a trente ans. Mais c’est une tradition qui n’est plus défendable aujourd’hui dans notre monde international et multiculturel. Pour que différentes cultures puissent vivre ensemble, il ne faut pas leur imposer nos règles, mais les respecter telles qu’elles sont. Anwaltinnen mit Kopftuch sind eine notwendige Zumutung.

La question d’admettre ou non une femme voilée au barreau ou un homme avec une kippa ou une croix est fondamentalement une question de quelle direction notre pays veut-il prendre ? Être un pays véritablement multiculturel et ouvert ? Ou être un pays traditionnaliste de blancs de l’Europe de l’Ouest ? D’ailleurs, qui définit « neutre » ? Qu’est-ce qu’est neutre ? Le voile et tout autre signe religieux devraient être un « no issue ». Le juge doit être impartial, peu importe qui se présente devant lui, et un voile, une kippa ou une croix ne devraient pas le déboussoler. Ce serait un problème fondamental de notre système judiciaire, si une avocate voilée risquait d’influencer l’impartialité d’un juge, car que pense ce juge alors d’un accusé ayant des traits d’un immigrant ? Que les juges n’ont pas le droit de porter des signes distinctifs est défendable, car ils représentent la justice. Mais un avocat ? Non, cela est juste inadmissible, pas aujourd’hui, pas chez nous.

Notre appel à changer cette tradition est peut-être demander beaucoup. Cela exige de changer notre vision du monde. Mais est-ce si mal ? N’est-il pas grand temps de faire cela ? En soit, il s’agit de la question fondamentale de savoir comment nous voulons que soit notre société. « La société forme le droit et le droit forme la société. » Le barreau devrait saisir cette opportunité et poser un exemple en changeant cette règle. Ce serait fondamentalement important pour toute notre société.

Voix de jeunes femmes

Je suis une femme et à onze ans, j’ai saigné.

Je n’avais rien demandé.

A ma naissance, le carnet rose m’attendait déjà.

« Tu viens de la planète Vénus, la planète qui tourne dans le sens contraire de toutes les autres.

Le changement de rotation va te bouleverser un peu, la notice indique une possibilité d’hémorragies répétitives comme effet secondaire à long terme. »

Je suis une fille et je dois payer le prix du sang.

Comme si les gouttes rouges devaient transformer ce carnet rose en bleu pour me rendre l’égale des garçons.

Et pour nettoyer cette souillure, je dois m’acquitter d’une dette.

Le prix du sang, je le paie une fois par mois.

Je le paie de façon physique, en douleurs et crampes.

Je le paie de façon psychologique, en honte et en contraintes.

Je le paie de façon économique, en tampons et serviettes hygiéniques surtaxés.

C’est la nouvelle trinité : la mère, la fille et le saint argent.

#NoTaxTampon

Alma Poulain

Run like a girl - Blogeintrag

" I run like a girl " est notre premier grand projet. Comme la commission jeune n'a été créée que très récemment, nous avons commencé avec un projet destiné à nous rendre plus visibles.

L'événement de l'ING Night Marathon nous a semblé être une opportunité à ne pas manquer.

Nous avons fait des bracelets et des T-Shirts avec le slogan "I run like a girl" pour propager le message. Le slogan est censé renverser les préjugés sexistes et encourager les femmes athlètes.

Nous avons été inspirés par un spot de la marque "Always" : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjJQBjWYDTs&t=107s

Plus de 1.750 bracelets avec notre slogan ont été distribués, et nous continuons à en vendre.

Si vous êtes intéressés commandez vos T-Shirts/Bracelets en écrivant un mail à lou.reckinger@hotmail.fr !

Nous tenons à remercier nos supporteurs et nos sponsors:

Ernst & Young Luxembourg Elvinger Hoss Prussen BGL (Luxembourg) Banque de Luxembourg Investments Your Future at Deloitte (Luxembourg) Cactus Group ADT-Center

Lou Reckinger